Ten Years

My sweet Katelyn-
     Ten years ago today you were so quickly taken from us.  We didn't see it coming at all and I've spent the past ten years wondering what I would have done differently had I known how suddenly you would be gone.  Some of my biggest regrets in life happened in the hospital the day you were born and although I can't get those moments back, I'd like to think that if I had to do it all over again, I would have done some things very differently. 
     First, I never would have taken the pain medicine that the doctor and nurses encouraged me to take after you were born.  The pills made me so sleepy and I hardly remember them bringing you back to the room and placing you so gently next to me.  I will always remember your perfect little fingers and toes but I wish I could have been more alert so that I could have memorized every perfect and tiny thing about you. 
     My other biggest regret was that we didn't have a camera that day.  The nurses took a few pictures of you for me and daddy on a disposable camera but they were very grainy and blurry.  I'd give anything to have a good picture of you, especially one of your precious little hands and feet.
     And even though I have some regrets, there are many things that I'll never regret when I think about your short little life.  Most important, I'll never regret being your mommy.  Losing you was the hardest thing I've ever had to face but you helped mold me into the mother I am today and for that I am so grateful.  I'm not a perfect mom and there are many days that I go to bed feeling like a failure but I don't ever take being a mom for granted.  I remember the pain I felt in the weeks and months after you were gone and I remember crying out to God and praying that he would once again make me a mother.  I'm thankful that he heard my cries and answered my prayers and there is not a day that goes by that I don't think about you and feel grateful for the chance to be a mom again. 
     As I think about you today on your birthday, I pray you will know how much I still love you and miss you. I know that you are celebrating in heaven but I would give anything to have you here celebrating with me and daddy and your siblings.  You will always hold a very special place in our hearts and I am grateful for the hope I have that we will be reunited one day.  Until then, always know that you are loved dearly and never forgotten. 
     Happy Birthday, my sweet angel!  I love you to heaven and back, Mommy

August/September Little Things

Tomorrow is the last day of September and since I never got around to posting about August little things, I decided to combine the past two months into one post.  We are now six weeks into the school year and it has flown by.  The holidays are going to be here before we know it!  Here are a few little things that happened over the past two months:

- We kept my parent's dog Brinkley for a few days while they were out of town in August and Lily was in heaven.  She wants a dog so badly and loved getting to play with him whenever she wanted. 

- I have no idea what Lily was doing but she wanted me to take a picture of her making a silly face at breakfast one morning. 

-My mom, sister and I took the girls on our first annual "Back to School" shopping trip.   Out goal was to try and find the girls something to wear on their first day of school. We were not terribly successful but I did find several things for Eden to wear once the weather gets colder.  We had a great girl's day out and I hope it is something we will be able to do every year with the girls.   

-Granstan surprised the kids with his new Corvette one Saturday afternoon.  Owning a Corvette is something my dad had wanted for as long as I can remember and it's so fun to see his dream finally come true.  Parker loved getting to ride around the block with him!

-Ryan and Lily didn't start preschool until the first week in September so they got to spend some extra time with Granna while the rest of us were already in school.  As always, Granna spoiled them with special treats like ice cream, picnics, donuts, playdates at the park, swimming and painting.  I'm glad they got to have some quality time together before preschool started.

-I took the kids to see Shawn the Sheep as one last summer outing.  There is very little dialogue in the movie and I may or may not have fallen asleep a few times while we were watching it.  The kids seemed to like it and I'm always glad to have an excuse to eat movie theater popcorn!

-Emily got a job as a part time speech therapist in our school district.  I do not see her very often but it is fun on those rare occasions when we are in the same place at the same time, like the district convocation during our week of inservice.  We definitely threw a lot of people off, especially those who didn't know I had a twin sister!

-I got to hang out with Ryan for a little bit on his actual birthday.  My mom had gotten him a little cake to celebrate on his special day.  I still can't believe he is already 4 years old!

-Parker, Eden and I survived our first week of school and all wore our blue shirts for the first Gerard "Blue Out" of the year.

-We celebrated Labor Day with a cookout at Emily and Jon's house.  Cory wanted to take the kids to see the fire trucks so we all loaded up and drove to Jon's station for a tour.  They loved getting to sit in the driver's seat of Jon's fire engine but their favorite part of the night was when the firefighters that were on shift offered them a popsicle. 

That wraps up August and September.  I'm looking forward to the next couple of months as we get ready for cooler temperatures, birthday celebrations for the girls, and lots of pumpkin spice lattes!

It's Soccer Time!

Towards the end of summer, the girls started begging me to sign them up for soccer.  In a moment of weakness, I agreed.  Because of their age difference, they were put on two different teams which meant double the practices and double the games.  Add to that Parker's baseball practices/tournaments and a husband that works on Saturday and my life instantly got a lot crazier as soon as I signed them up!

 

Eden got picked up by the Thundercats- a team with several of her friends.  We've known the coach for several years so he knows Eden and how timid she can be.  He knew that there was a chance she would back out of playing the moment she realized that other people were in the stands watching her. 

 

I'm happy to say that she's doing great!  She loves playing offense and has gotten more and more aggressive at each game she's played.  The other girls on her team have all played for several years so there are times when she is still trying to figure it all out, but overall she's picked the game up quickly.  They've welcomed her with open arms and have encouraged her so much.  Coach Mike has given her a lot of play time in each game and she looks forward to each and every practice and game.  The only time she has cried so far is when the game ended and it was time to go home!  We are so proud of how hard she is trying and for being so brave in a completely new and unfamiliar situation.



Lily is on a team with her good friend Dylann.  Their team is named Sugar and Spice and I'm pretty sure none of the girls on her team have ever played soccer before.  The girls are so fun to watch as they run up and down the field huddled around the ball trying to get it into the correct goal!

Lily has enjoyed playing but I'm not sure she will stick with it.  She is already talking about what she wants to try next! 

Overall, it has been a great experience for both girls!  They are having fun and learning a lot!  I'm anxious to see if they continue to enjoy playing as the season goes on.  Only time will tell if we will have two soccer stars on our hands!!

Happy 8th Birthday Addison!

Today my niece, Addison, turns 8 years old!  She has always wanted to have a swimming party with her friends but it is often too cold to swim by the middle of September.  This year she decided to move her party to the end of August and had several friends over to Granna's house to swim.  Even though she goes to Mansfield schools, she is still close to several of the sweet girls she met in kindergarten at Gerard.  They were all able to come celebrate with her this year.

Everyone had a great time swimming and eating pizza and cake.  I know she loved having all of her friends there to help her celebrate!

Today on her actual birthday, she requested a family dinner at Rosa's and then asked to go to the park to play with the cousins.  Unfortunately, Parker got strep throat and had to stay home with Cory but the girls and I had a great time celebrating with her.

Happy Birthday, Addison!  Aunt Amy loves you very much and is so proud of the beautiful young lady you are becoming!

Lily's First Day of Preschool

Lily had to wait two weeks after Parker and Eden started school for preschool to begin and she couldn't wait to get started!  She is doing what the big kids did when they were four years old- Sunshine Preschool on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday and Thursday School on Thursday.  She started Thursday school first and was so excited to be in Mrs. Angie's class, just like Eden was two years ago.  She walked right in and sat down without ever looking back.  I'm so glad she loves school!  She had a great first day and couldn't wait to go back!

The next week she started Sunshine Preschool with Miss Amy.  We went to our last preschool Meet the Teacher on Tuesday and she had her last first day of preschool on Friday. 

She has so many sweet friends in her class this year and I know she is going to enjoy preschool so much!

Lily's first day was a little bittersweet because it was the last time we will start preschool.  Ever.  This time next year, she will be joining me at Gerard and preschool will be a thing of the past.  I'm thankful for all of the wonderful years we've had at Sunshine and look forward to making more memories during her last year in preschool.